keywords[windows]="msg \"$chan\" \"$(shuf -n1 -e "Failure is not an option, it comes bundled with Windows!""Apple got all pissed off because I farted in their store. It's not my falt they don't have Windows...""Windows is dumb!""Did you know that Micro Soft is Linda's pet name for Bill Gates?""A computer without Windows is like a chocolate cake without the mustard.""Windows is stupid")!\""
keywords[sbl]="msg \"$chan\" \"Oh yeah! Let's all use SBL, a CLI reader that doesn't compile or work! That's a great idea! Or, here's an idea... USE FENRIR DUMB ASS!\""
keywords[chicken]="msg \"$chan\" \"$who, I'm gonna grab me $(shuf -n1 -e "a case of beer""a weed eater""a 5 gallon jug of vaseline""a can of wd40") and a $(shuf -n1 -e dead frozen live young) chicken, and $(shuf -n1 -e "have fun""make chicks""lay it like an egg""put my beak where it don't belong") ALL NIGHT LONG!!!\""