31 lines
1.0 KiB
Bash
Executable File
31 lines
1.0 KiB
Bash
Executable File
#!/usr/bin/env bash
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[ -f functions.sh ] && source functions.sh
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userNick="$1"
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shift
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chan="$1"
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shift
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question="$@"
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if [ "${question: -1:1}" != "?" ]; then
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message="Please phrase your answer in the form of a question."
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else
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case "${question,,}" in
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"do you have"*"balls?")
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if [[ "$(echo "$question" | tr -cd '[:digit:]')" =~ ^[0-9]+$ ]]; then
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message="I just have the 2 big ol' hairy balls $(shuf -n 1 -e "on your chin" "in your mouth")."
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else
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message="$(shuf -n1 -e "I have 2 greate big ol' hairy balls. You wanna touch 'em?" \
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"I've got balls of steel! Steel, steel, steel!" \
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"Balls balls balls! I've got balls of steel! Steel, steel, steel! BALLS OF STEEL!")"
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fi
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;;
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"does god exist?"|"is god real?"|"is there a god?")
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message="According to your $(shuf -e -n1 "mother" "daughter" "sister" "wife" "grandmother" "girl friend") I am God. She kept screaming it at me all last night, \"OH GOD ${nick^^} DON'T STOP!\""
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;;
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*)
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message="$(shuf -n1 -e "yes" "no" "maybe" "ask again later")."
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esac
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fi
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msg "$chan" "$userNick: $message"
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